Audible dot com.

These lovely beasts are named June and Loki. They hang out with Colonix now and then, but not because they like our take-no-prisoner approach to hardcore, or because we are three of the most talented musicians this world has to offer. As a matter of fact, when it comes to auditory pleasure, both of these dogs prefer the sounds of their own names being called (they are pretty vain animals) to the banshee screeches of Dan's vocals, or the whiskey-drenched wales of Jr.'s bass lines. They certainly care nothing for the primordial pounds that Pete calls "drumming". No, June and Loki hate punk and hard-core music. Contrary to popular oogle myth, it can be safely said that the majority of dogs hate loud music in general. I know, this seems like common sense. The fact of the matter is, this is a continual problem in the punk rock scene: fucking assholes think it's okay to bring their dogs inside of show spaces.
Colonix tries to stay out of politics*, mainly because the three of us have anger problems and usually end up in jail or psychiatric wards when we involve ourselves (hardly beneficial to the revolution). But this is a campaign we will crusade for until the bitter end. Please refrain from bringing your dog into show spaces. Colonix would rather you miss us than contribute to your dog's hearing loss. Thank you.


*Note: This is a flagrant lie. Pete Swanson is the President of the Belltown chapter of the Tea Party. Jr., along with being a lifelong member of the NRA can also be found at union halls across the pacific northwest urging union members to disband this "socialist conspiracy" that "continually inflates wages by artificial means" and allow for the market to work out economic ailments. Danny rigorously campaigns with the Libertarian party, has endorsed renowned holocaust denier, Pat Buchanan for president the three times he has run and is currently interning at the American Enterprise Institute as research lackey.